Let the Vundersex Begin!!!

Technically our first day in Amsterdam is over and we are starting our second day. I figured I better try to get it all down before I forget, which I know I will. First of all, I thought I was overwhelmed in Belgium. Amsterdam is crazy. That might be the best way to describe it. We woke up around 7 am in Brugges, ate breakfast and hit the road by 9:30am. We arrived in Amsterdam around 12:00pm. Tim kept saying, "Wait until you see the bikes...driving in Amsterdam is freaky cuz there will be bikes, pedestrians and cars all vying for a position on the street." Was he right?All I can say is OMG!

A Holland Windmill

 Bikes, Bikes Bikes

It's kinda hard to tell, but this is a pic out our car window as we were driving thrru the streets. 

Other than the fact that my palms were clammy and my pits were sweating from trying to make sure I was actaully driving in a lane, not hitting people on foot, people on bikes, other cars or the trolleys, I did pretty good. People park on the streets here...in the driving lanes. So, what do the cars do? They drive up on the median and just go around. Duh. Don't worry about the fact that there are trolley tracks and trolleys that are RUNNING! I only made one wrong turn during the driving foray.  Right onto a very small one way road. On my right was the canal, on my left were buildings. I made a 10 point turn and got out of there as fast as possible. Stupid, RUDE FRENCH GPS system.

The inside of our hotel lobby. This hotel is really lovely. 

OUR ROOM

I would like a clock like this someday!

We went out for a walk in search of food and found many places to choose from. With ENGLISH menus! I found a BLTCA with my name on it (BLT plus chicken and avacado). YUMMY

 LUNCH

I couldn't get that food in my mouth fast enough! We were both so grateful there was something besides Stewed Eel on the menu!

Next stop...Cannibis Coffee Shop! Which we found in all of five minutes! They are everywhere. They even have menus for it. Pure Weed, weed mixed with tobacco, kinds of weed with different names, hash brownies, hash muffins, cannibis coffee, black hash, blonde hash...etc. Zanadu! LOL

Someone obviously had some good weed to come up with THIS grafitti!

We are eating lunch at a little place and I snapped a picture of all the hustle and bustle going on. This is the marijuana capital of the world. Look at all those people! But wait...where is all the crime? Where are all the pot heads walking around acting stupid? Where is all the Taboo stuff? This is a society where a plant that is illegal almost everywhere else, is completely socially acceptable here. There is a ton of controversy in the United States right now over Marijuana. Our government seems to be afraid that our society is going to fall apart if we make marijuana use legal. Look at these people. They all seem to be functioning just fine. Hmmm How interesting! And now you know MY viewpoint on legalizing Marijuana. :)

There are a few Museums we were searching for but first we needed to find a currency exchange office, which led us down to Times Square.

 One of the "Robot men." I am glad Tim didn't get into a robot war with him. "ZZZZT ZZZZT ERROR ERROR!" Again another reference to Euro Trip. HAHA

Wait a minute! After looking at the pics, I realized this robot guy is a pervert! Look where he placed my hand compared to where he placed Tim's hand. Oh well. At least he was straight.

The giant Ferris Wheel and some other ride that made me want to puke just watching it. I don't really like Ferris wheels and Tim says there is an even bigger one in London. My guts can only handle one ferris wheel on this trip, so I guess we are waiting for the big one. Fantastic.

 AHHH, The beginning of the Red Light District. Of course, if you know ME at all, you know this is where I HAD to come. 

It's like New Orleans on steroids! Where Bourbon Street is one long street and once you walk up it, you just turn around and walk back the way you came. Here you walk to the end, then turn and BAM...a whole new street to explore. 

To all my Intimate Avenue Consultants...The Lelo brand we are bringing out next month is HUGE here in Europe. We are on the right track with those products!

Trying on Masks at the Masquerade Store

The Formal night on the cruise we are going on is Masquerade, so we each bought a mask. Should be fun plus it will be a great souvenir!

Masquerade Store

Screw Michelangelo...Now, on to MY museums!

The Erotic Museum

The first museum we found was the Erotic Museum. Inside this building were all kinds of toys from years and years ago. Everything from glass, wood, jade, Lladro handmade stuff, all kinds of photos.

Oops...talk about standing in the wrong spot at the wrong time for a photo. Oh well, it turned out funny.

There was even a disney room, which I have not decided yet if it was funny or just disturbing. We went a little silly with Snow White but I will leave those pics off of THIS blog. 

This was the torture BDSM room. Please Let me out!!!

Tim in the Torture chair. He looks miserable doesn't he?

I know, I look sad too.

OOH LA LA

Looks exactly like Tim. He just needs a hair cut.

After this museum, we found the The Dungeon.  I don't have any pics of this, as they did not allow photos. The best way to explain this is...The BEST haunted house I have ever been to in my life! It took about an hour to go through it, there was even a roller coaster at the end. The seperated us several times which made it really scary. At one point I grabbed on to some guy and held on tight for a good solid minute and a half before I realized he wasn't Tim. It was pretty funny actually.

After the Dungeon experience, we stopped in a coffee shop for coffee and a treat. 

 MMM...Brownies!!!

MMM...Brownies!!!

After this coffee shop, it was about 6:00pm and we were hitting the wall again so we headed back to the hotel for some much needed rest. I slept like a baby for a solid 3 hours. We got up again and headed back out in search of food at about 10:30pm. 

Then back to the red light district.

I don't even know how to explain what we saw. Hookers in window after window. They just stand there and dance, barely...well it's more of a small shimmy as they try to entice you to come in so they can pull the curtain.  I offered Tim one. Hey! Don't judge me! It's not every day you come to Amsterdam and get to see real prostitutes.  He did decline.  I figured just for offering, that probably makes me the best wife ever...even if I was just kidding! 

So we went to a live sex show instead. LOL

And that was the end of day ONE.

This place is crazy. I want to live here. HAHA